AH, CHOPSTICKS. No matter how many times we meet, I never quite seem to learn my lesson.
Whenever my girlfriend and I go for a slap-up meal at a Chinese restaurant, I can never quite bring myself to swallow my utensil pride and opt for the knife and fork.
And at the start I always do rather well... big lumps of meat and veg? No problem for my nimble fingers.
But it’s when it gets down to the last morsels that the problems really begin, as I’m left stabbing at single grains of rice as my girlfriend gleefully scrapes hers up in a one-er.
My latest battle between man and stick was at Chi, a classy bar restaurant in the Academy shopping centre.
Although admittedly it was the weekend, the restaurant was absolutely packed – always an encouraging sign.
The menu was filled with delights, but our eyes were drawn to the mouth-watering selection of set meals.
After much pondering, we plumped for the grand-sounding Imperial buffet (£23 per person, for a minimum of two).
Our platter of starters gave an idea of the feast that was to follow.
The plate was bursting with chicken satay, BBQ ribs, chicken shred, butterfly prawns and seaweed, with a selection of dipping sauces.
While the meat was tender and the flavours beautifully delicate, the best part was the total lack of grease on any of the nibbles – an unexpected surprise.
As if those starters weren’t enough of an appetiser, our next course of shredded duck pancakes swiftly followed.
After the wonderful starters the duck was slightly disappointing, with most of it either quite dry or extremely fatty, although the plum sauce, cucumber, spring onions and pancakes livened it up.
As our plates were cleared away, we realised we were actually pretty full.
But with four main courses, complete with rice and noodles, still to come, there was still a lot of eating to be done.
The shredded chilli beef – my personal favourite – was lovely, with the sauce rich without being cloying.
My girlfriend got stuck into the spring onion and ginger chicken, an unusual-sounding combination which worked really well.
The lemon chicken and kung po prawn were both delicious, but after our mountain of starters there was just too much food to eat.
It would be a comfortable meal for two, if the two happened to be the Michelin Man and Shrek.
Thankfully, our smiling waitress was happy to pack up our significant leftovers for us to take home, leaving us plenty to eat the next day.
With a fork.